First things first – there is no such thing as a perfect relationship. Expecting one will not only drive you to insanity, it will keep you alone. Following these do’s and don’ts can enhance the relationship you are in.


1. Don’t think that you can fix your partner. The only person that you can fix is yourself.

2. Don’t try and change your partner. This is an impossible task. You are powerless over people, places and things.

3. Don’t take away what your partner loves to do most. If your mate loves to watch football with the boys, buy him a case of beer and send him off. He will more than likely want to come home to you sooner. If he loves to play golf, let him. Buy him a golf shirt. He will love you for that. If she wants to have a girls night out – order them a bottle of wine or a chocolate cake and surprise her. Hmmm…I wonder what she will do for you when she comes home that night. If she has a dream career or hobby – support her in any way you can so that she can fulfill her dreams.

4. Don’t lie, be unforgiving, selfish, impatient, secretive or vindictive.

5. Don’t think that your relationship is going to be perfect. There is no such thing. Expecting a perfect relationship will keep you disappointed forever. Erase the La La Land fairytale that “Prince Charming saves the princess” fantasy. This will never happen. Allow the Sleeping Beauty within you to wake up and explore more about you.


1. Do know your vision as a couple. Keep working toward that vision. Build steps into making it happen.

2. Know your wants and not wants in a relationship.

3. Know the time that you want to spend with yourself, alone as a couple, and as a couple with others. Negotiate and compromise this time together as a couple.

4. Ask yourselves the most difficult questions in each area of your life: home, money, work, sex, health and food, family, children, community life, friends, spiritual, and mental. Burying your head won’t solve them. Lead to an agreement or a united plan.

5. Remember you are supposed to be on the same team. Be each other’s Best Friends.